Coping with terminal illness can be a difficult journey, not only for the patient, but for loved ones, as well. Seeking support from others who are or who have experienced the same thing can help immensely, though, making the process a little less painful.
Finding Support Groups
Each person has their individual preferences regarding the ideal support group, so choosing one can depend on a number of factors, including geographical proximity to a meeting location, availability of convenient scheduling, and a sense of connection to the other members. Often, it can take a bit of time to find the right fit, but the advice and camaraderie of others who understand is well worth the effort. In addition to in-person meetings, there are a number of sources for online support groups. A quick internet search is likely to result in a number of possibilities.
Solace and Understanding
Often, it can take several meetings before new members are comfortable enough to open up about their feelings, but seasoned members are sure to understand this reluctance. Talking to strangers about personal things can be difficult, but grief and illness support groups are filled with people who share a common sadness, making them sensitive to the needs of other members. It is not uncommon for outsiders to expect the grieving process to move along rather quickly, but for many, it can take quite a while before they learn to find peace and acceptance. The members of illness and grief support groups understand this and are generally accepting of each person’s need to grieve in their own way.
While some support groups are open to anyone who is having trouble coping with the illness or death of a loved one, membership in others is specified by the relationship that the member has/had with the terminally ill patient. For example, there are groups available for spouses, siblings, children, and grown children, each with unique characteristics designed to meet the needs of that group. While all sorts of groups can be beneficial, those with others who most closely relate to each other’s feelings and experiences may be best suited to provide complete understanding.
An Open Forum
Often, friends and family members of someone suffering a terminal illness hold back from sharing their stress, anxiety, and fear with the patient or others who are close because they hope to avoid adding to an already difficult situation. While this is a noble intention, bottling up emotions isn’t healthy. Family members are often experiencing many of the same emotions as their ailing loved one, and finding a safe place to talk freely about their turbulent emotions can help make the process easier to handle. Not only do support groups offer members opportunities to reveal their worries, but helping other members to heal can in itself, provide hope. Members who have reached a place of acceptance can serve as examples to the others that although it might currently seem impossible, the pain will lessen a bit over time.
Far too many people try to put on brave fronts in times of crisis, but there is no need to do so. Support groups can offer members opportunities to express their emotions, helping them to heal and move on with their lives.
My neice who is 24years old, has a 3year old son, who was born with a brain tumour, and 4months ago, was diagnosed as terminal, with only 2mth-1year to live.My neice isnt speaking to anyone, as it all feels too real, and she cant cope, and the rest of us, are just as bad, we really need help to cope with this.Can you suggest the best possible organisation or anything you may think beneficial for my neice individually and the rest of us for family advise as of how to help my neice.Please help as we are all in a state is disbelief and we are not coping with this well at all.My neice needs help to live with this until the day her son passes away, and she will need help wi th the bereavement afterwards.This is very hard for me to send and ask for help as like my neice it all seems just too much to accept.
georgia - 28 December 2011 @ 11:03 PM
I also need a support group of some kind. My husband is at home under hospice care for his chronic heart condition. He has 17% ejection fraction(?) and CHF, diabetes, strokes, etc.He has had 8 heart attacks and is no longer able to undergo any type of surgeries or treatments except oxygen and lots of meds. I am 13 yrs younger than him and am feeling depressed about everything. I am scared and am sometimes impatient and hate myself for it. I feel overwhelmed and on other days I am in denial altogether. Anyways, dont know what happens after i put this into cyberspace, but it feels better to type it out
ShannyJo - 28 December 2011 @ 7:24 AM
Looking for a grief support group. My daughter has a terminal illness and I would like to be around others who are experiencing this type of grief.
Kathy - 7 December 2011 @ 3:15 AM
I am in need of a support group as my best friend is a young woman dying of ovarian cancer. I need someone that I can discuss my feelings with regarding her dying.
saddsaxx - 21 September 2011 @ 5:29 PM
I read the above comment and was amazed . That someone else out there is dealing with the same thing as I am.My husband got diagnosed 6 yrs ago with CHF at the age of 41. The ejection fraction was below 30 then. His Dr. said he would be lucky to make it 4 yrs.Since then he has had 2 strokes and at least 1 heart attack that I know of. At that time are youngest boy was 5. Today he is 11 and I finally had to tell him his dad isn't ever going to get better only worse. What every parent hopes never to have to tell there child .It gets better I am a caregiver for my chosen profession which deals with the terminal ill. I work long hrs and have to ask my kids to not only care for themselves but to watch over there dad . I really need someone to talk with cause am at my wits end . Forgot to mention he is still trying to work cause he thinks we wouldn't be able to survive with his income. And as sure as I am writing this I know he is having TIA's. If anyone can help me find a group to join I would be so thankful ! I feel I have the weight of the world laying on top of me.
Carol
Ka - 24 July 2011 @ 7:22 AM
How do I find a support group for me--I am under alot of stress and anxiety and really need someone to talk to. My husband has a heart condition that has been going on for the last 10 years. This year we have had several set backs adding to our stress and fear and pain. He is a tough guy type and doesn't want to talk at all about it but I do and really need to talk to someone.
